Our assistant dean would like the NYPD detectives currently working the crime scene in the Rose Garden to know who she is and that she’ll be speaking to their superiors about the way they are treating her today. #SheDoesntDoTwitterSoArrestHer
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
ALERT: The “realistic” crime scene in the Rose Garden is a real crime scene. Please try not to destroy too much evidence before the NYPD gets there to secure the scene. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Please note: For the safety of the public, trick or treating is not permitted in the residence halls. Sorry kids, the rule is for your safety and the safety of your parents. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
That scary looking lady shouting at people that she’s a serial killer and daring them to stop her is just a Halloween performance artist and her threats are all an act. We think. (Anyone want to ask her about it?)
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Sadly, the zoning commission would not permit us to build steps at the satellite courthouse. Apparently they thought it would be “too dangerous”.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Plus, we have special “scholarships” for Law enforcement officials and their families! #WeLookTheOtherWay
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Will you be staying on campus for Thanksgiving Weekend? #DidYouKnow that most life insurance policies have a clause declaring them to be invalid if death occurs on the Hudson campus during Thanksgiving Weekend?
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Since we don’t think anyone on our management team reads these tweets anyway, now seems to be the perfect time to ask the important question- does anyone else think that Funko should make a Keith Morrison POP? We’d totally buy one. #HudsonWishList
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Looking for a special discount at Logan’s Pub tonight? Come dressed up as your favorite Dateline NBC, 48 Hours, Investigation Discovery or 20/20 reporter for drink discounts and all you can eat buffalo wings!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
We were supposed to remind everyone that the Hudson University subway station will be closed all day today due to Halloween. (The MTA has better things to worry about than Hudson shenanigans on Halloween.) #SorryFolks
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Contrary to today’s Ledger article, Hudson University is NOT a “living horror story” where “Halloween happens for real every day”. We’ve only had a handful of murders so far this year! #HudsonUMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Please Be Advised: only one of the several “crime scenes” currently taped off on campus is real. Can you guess which one? #OnlyAtHudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Our assistant dean told us to tell you that if you can vote for “that Idol show” you can vote next week in a real election. He may be out of touch, but he’s right- you should vote- no joke! #Vote #NoExcuses
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
You may notice stranger than usual events occurring on campus today due to Halloween. We know it is difficult to tell what is stranger than usual around here, but please try to refrain from calling campus security until you’re 100% certain that you are in actual danger.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
Happy Halloween! #DidYouKnow that a satellite courthouse has been setup on campus for your convenience? Get arraigned and arrange for bail without leaving campus! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 31, 2018
The so-called “axe murderer” walking through the quad with a “bloody” axe is just dressed up for Halloween and not a threat. We think.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 30, 2018
Please do not steal any of the irradiated rats or monkeys from Tripley Lab as part of a Halloween prank. They are extremely aggressive and most likely dangerous. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 30, 2018
Underage? Please don’t drink alcoholic beverages in the residence hall. If you must, do it at Logan’s Pub. They won’t be carding tomorrow from 5PM until the state alcohol agency shuts them down. #WeLookTheOtherWay
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 30, 2018
We do not encourage our professors to dress up for Halloween, so if your professor shows up in a “costume”, they’re most likely up to something and it won’t be good. #YouveBeenWarned
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 30, 2018
Unfortunately, we were unable to book Retired NYPD Detective John Munch for another Halloween Conspiracy-palooza this year. That means we don’t know why he’s ranting on the steps of Branch Hall. Anyone brave enough to ask him what he wants?
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 30, 2018
To celebrate our great Halloween 2018, we’re offering free tacos in the quad today while supplies last! BTW, we believe that the tacos we’ll be serving are at least vegetarian. We’re not exactly sure what’s in them, but it’s definitely not meat. #TacoTuesday
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 30, 2018
It’s Tuesday and we have just one more day until Halloween! Please continue to behave- we’re happy to report that nothing controversial has made its way onto the front page of the Ledger so far! #PleaseBeCool
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 30, 2018
#DidYouKnow that Hudson has special “scholarships” for the children of NYPD detectives? Visit Branch Hall for full details.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 29, 2018
#DidYouKnow that the film “Weekend at Bernie’s” was based on an event that occurred on the Hudson campus? The only difference was that the real students actually did commit the murder.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 29, 2018
#DidYouKnow that Hudson meal cards can be used in the visitor’s cafeteria at Rikers Island?
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 29, 2018
We have run out of free corn dogs, but we still have plenty of ketchup and mustard packets! #SorryFolks
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 29, 2018
Thanks to a generous gift of $25 Million from Billy Tripley and Tripley Toys, we now have additional funding for free legal assistance for students. You’d better hurry, though- this funding will probably get used up fast around here. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 29, 2018
Since Halloween is Wednesday, we’re keeping our enhanced security procedures until then. Please continue to not do things that will get bad press for Hudson University. #PleaseBeCool
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 29, 2018
Happy Monday! You all did so well this past weekend that we’re handing out a special treat in the quad today! Enjoy a free corn dog at lunchtime while supplies last! They’re seriously freezer burned, but we’re assuming that once we fry them up they’ll be good. #GoodJob
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 29, 2018
The alleged “body dump” currently being reported is just a Halloween prank. We think.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 28, 2018
Based on our non-scientific poll, the top four costumes that Hudson students are wearing this year are: Keith Morrison, NYPD Detective Robert Goren, Nancy Grace and “Sexy Keith Morrison”. #HudsonHalloween
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 28, 2018
Okay, last night was apparently a quiet one considering that Halloween is next week. What are you all up to? #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 28, 2018
We’re getting a head start on the holidays! Please let the housing office know ASAP if you plan on staying in the dorms during Thanksgiving Weekend. You will also need to provide contact information for the person you would like us to contact should an “accident” occur.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 28, 2018
Briscoe’s Cafe is open for Brunch today! The rodent infestation situation has been resolved for today! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 28, 2018
Again, we are issuing the following apology just in case one is needed: “Hudson is appalled by the events/racist costume/inappropriate behavior that took place last night. We take these violations very seriously and would like to apologize for the actions of our students.”
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 28, 2018
It has come to our attention that retired NYPD Detective John Munch has been claiming that we have ties to the Illuminati. That’s preposterous! We cut our ties with the Illuminati a few weeks ago. #HudsonMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 27, 2018
Food allergy warning: the dining commons might have cross contaminated several entrees with peanut dust. Oddly enough, the only food that we can guarantee has no peanuts in it are the “peanut butter” and jelly sandwiches. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 27, 2018
Attention freshmen- things will get really weird on campus from now until Halloween. Even weirder than usual. #YouveBeenWarned
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 27, 2018
Logan’s Pub will not be “too careful” when checking IDs this weekend, if you catch our drift. #WeLookTheOtherWay
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 27, 2018
As it turns out, nothing controversial happened last night that we know of, so please disregard the apology tweet at this time, though we reserve the right to point to that apology if something does come out about last night. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 27, 2018
Hudson Administration would like us to issue this preemptive apology: “Hudson is appalled by the events/racist costume/inappropriate behavior that took place last night. We take these violations very seriously and would like to apologize for the actions of our students.”
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 27, 2018
Okay, it’s the Friday night before Halloween- please don’t do anything stupid tonight! If you must insist on doing something stupid, do it at NYU, okay? They think they’re so great because they have a much lower crime rate than us! #SnobU
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 26, 2018
“While the rest of the world enjoyed pretend horrors on Halloween, Hudson students experienced a real life nightmare.” Doesn’t that sound like real narration from a real true crime show? Anyone know if Dateline NBC is looking for writers?!? #MessageUs
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 26, 2018
The lady wandering around campus dressed up like Faith Yancey isn’t actually Faith Yancey but she thinks she is, so try to avoid her if at all possible. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 26, 2018
That guy who is dressed up like Dennis Murphy from Dateline NBC really is Dennis Murphy, so please say hi to him for us and see if you can figure out what he’s investigating. There could be an A in it for you. #OnlyAtHudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 26, 2018
Okay, we’ve already gotten some questions asking about what might be offensive/controversial/risqué. If you aren’t sure and have to ask, it’s probably offensive/controversial/risqué so don’t wear it! #HudsonPublicServiceMessage
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 26, 2018
Since most of you will be celebrating drunken Halloween frat parties this weekend, please refrain from wearing offensive, risqué or controversial costumes! And if you must, don’t post them on social media! #HudsonPublicServiceMessage
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 26, 2018
We made it to Friday! Who’da thunk it? #HudsonWeekend
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 26, 2018
Did you encounter an eccentric waiter during brunch today at Briscoe’s? That was NYPD Detective Robert Goren, working a case. If you said anything incriminating during your meal, you just might need a lawyer. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 25, 2018
We don’t know who made this, but hardly any of the scabs who crossed the picket line were beat down. #HudsonMythBusting pic.twitter.com/C1BvskqihA
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 25, 2018
#DidYouKnow that Hudson University somehow inspired the movie “Jaws”? Apparently the murderous Shark was based on a Hudson professor who murdered random people in a University pool.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 25, 2018
#ThrowbackThursday to when “The Facts of Life” featured Hudson University! pic.twitter.com/zfq2tMNwJm
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 25, 2018
On behalf of Dean Gilmore and the entire board of Hudson University, we would like to apologize to NYPD Detective Robert Goren for Dean Gilmore’s unfortunate comments to the NY Ledger about Det. Goren being a “Nut job” and “unstable”. Though have you met that guy? <Cuckoo>!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 25, 2018
Did you find a body on campus over the last few days and were waiting to report it? Our security department is ready to assist you! #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 25, 2018
It’s Thursday and we’ve made a special “agreement” with the union to end the strike! Things should go back to normal- or what passes for normal around here. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 25, 2018
Okay, so we got through another strike day! Just one more day- can we make it through another one of these? #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
Parking has been a challenge because nobody is enforcing parking restrictions. Oops, we probably shouldn’t have mentioned that. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
Hey guys- when you’re done making your own dinner in the dining commons, maybe you could make something for the chancellor too? There could be a 4.0 in it for you. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
The wild dogs who have taken over the Enron Rose Garden will be dealt with on Friday when the three day strike is over and our maintenance team is back at work. Until then, buy a steak and throw it at them if you need to walk past it. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
Things are getting tense at the admin building. Detective Robert Goren was able to waltz in and arrest a vice chancellor without anyone being around to yell at him that he couldn’t go in there. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
The strikers’ union has claimed that we could give them all raises if we shutdown the Hudson Faculty Country Club during the winter months when hardly anyone uses it. That’s true, but we’re totally not doing that. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
Did anyone make their own lunch in the dining commons today? Was it good? Could you bring some of it to the chancellor’s office? #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
We would like to express our outrage at the Ledger’s accusation that we are putting students and patients at risk during this strike. Our students should be more afraid of each other than they should be of our mismanagement. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
Tonight’s performance of “Gallagher Live” has been canceled due to lack of interest and not because of the strike. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
All classes scheduled in Branch Hall have been canceled due to an electrical problem. Unless you know someone who is an electrician and is willing to cross a picket line? #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
Please Note: Hudson Medical Center is not too impacted by the strike; they’re always slow over there most of the time anyway. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
Campus security is currently overwhelmed with calls. Please call us only if you have an active emergency. If you come across a dead body on campus, that can wait until Friday when the strike is over. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
Good Morning! Today we’re trying something new at the Dining Commons- make your own meal! And while you’re all at it, go ahead and make something for the chancellor as well. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 24, 2018
Things didn’t go too poorly on campus today! Just two more days until the strike is over, so you all can handle that, right? #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Hudson University Security is also on strike, so we’re looking for volunteers to help us patrol campus. Brave and willing to take risks? Help us out and save 10% off your tuition! #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Hey, students- looking for something to eat that’s not Profaci’s Pizza? Too bad, because that’s all we’ve got! #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Apparently package deliveries will be delayed because the package delivery companies will not cross the picket lines and because they see our campus as being unsafe. Actually, it’s more likely the second thing. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Hudson University values ALL of its employees; though it values some of them more than others. The employees striking today are valued less than faculty but more than the Tripley Lab monkeys and rats. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Did you park your car in the north gate parking lot? The strikers most likely set your car on fire. Or maybe it was students. It’s too soon to tell. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Please be careful in Tripley Lab today. The people who normally make sure that the irradiated monkeys and rats stay in their cages are on strike. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Thanks to our friends at Profaci’s Pizza, we’ll be serving their “delicious” “pizza” in the dining commons today. And tonight. And tomorrow. Love Profaci’s Pizza? You’d better learn to love it! #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Does anyone know how to reheat frozen corn dogs? The dining commons staff all went on strike and we could really use some help. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Please ignore any e-mails claiming to be from the chancellor asking you to bail him out. Those are most likely a scam caused by the virus currently infesting our servers. Other e-mails asking you to donate to Hudson are definitely valid. We think. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
When faced with having to open up his own e-mails without his assistant, our Dean of IT clicked on a virus, which has affected campus servers. Hopefully none of you were looking to get any productive work done today. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
The so-called strikers currently handing out strike-related flyers in the quad are actually clever process servers handing out subpoenas and summonses. Beware! #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
Isn’t it a wonderful Tuesday morning? Our administration wants us to talk about how everything is great on campus despite the strike, but we’re honestly just moments away from a full-fledged “Lord of the Flies” situation. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 23, 2018
#DidYouKnow that Hudson has the best forensics program in the country? Our forensics students get hands on experience by helping investigate Hudson’s various on-campus crimes. #HudsonUPride
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 22, 2018
Have you used the campus wireless service- HudsonSecureWiFi? You’ve probably been hacked. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 22, 2018
Okay, it looks like there will be a strike tomorrow. Apparently our employees want to get paid with non-bouncing checks, so we’re currently at an impasse. Plan for a strike tomorrow. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 22, 2018
Please Note: We do not recommend that you dress up for Halloween on campus. Please note that if you do, it’s at your own risk. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 22, 2018
Contrary to this morning’s Ledger, Tripley Lab is not a “complete and total horror show”. Sure, it might be a horror show, but it certainly isn’t “complete and total”. #HudsonMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 22, 2018
Has anyone heard of a show called “Studio 60”? It’s supposed to be an SNL type show and apparently they made fun of us this weekend. Nobody here has ever heard of it before. But whatever they said, it was wrong. #HudsonUMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 22, 2018
Happy Monday! We’re hoping to come to an agreement with our unions today, but if not, we’ll begin making backup plans this evening in case they strike tomorrow. Procrastination: it’s not just for students! #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 22, 2018
Looking for spare cash? Be a scab next week! Several unions will be striking next week, so we’re looking for people willing to cross a Hudson picket line. Please note: We are not responsible for injury or death. #WorkAtHudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 21, 2018
Looking for some 4K views of the Hudson campus? Netflix now has many true crime documentaries featuring stunning B-Roll of the Hudson campus. Just watch them with the sound turned down. #HudsonUPride
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 21, 2018
Next weekend’s scheduled trip to Universal Studios has been canceled. Apparently we’ve been scammed because there’s isn’t a Universal Studios theme park in the Bronx. Please remember our policy if you bought tickets from us- no refunds.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 21, 2018
The heavy police presence at south gate does not mean that there is anything dangerous happening on campus. The NYPD is just trying to protect the city from our students.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 21, 2018
Our finance department “invested” the dining commons funds for the next week in buying thousands of Power Ball tickets. Since we lost, we’ll be serving PB&J sandwiches all week. #DidSomebodySayMcDonalds
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 21, 2018
Happy Sunday! Briscoe’s Cafe is fully open for brunch today. The rodent situation has been fully resolved. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 21, 2018
Professor Thomas is not the next Colonel Sanders on those KFC commercials. He’s just dressed up that way and shouting on the quad because he’s insane. #HudsonMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 21, 2018
Other schools give preferred parking spots to professors who become Nobel Laureates. We give preferred parking spots to professors who go a year without being indicted or becoming the subject of an investigation. So far there are still three professors in the running. #GoodLuck
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 20, 2018
Our chancellor is not a reptilian as insinuated by John Munch. Please stop asking him to display his forked tongue.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 20, 2018
#DidYouKnow that students who get injured on campus as a result of crime (even their own) get discounts on health care at the Hudson Medical Center? This is a popular and well used perk! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 20, 2018
We’re always looking for alumni willing to admit they went to Hudson to feature in the alumni magazine! Just visit the Alumni Center!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 20, 2018
#DidYouKnow that we’re running a makeshift cryonics lab in Tripley Hall? Donate millions to campus and we’ll stash you in one of our spare freezers until we can either resurrect you or the power goes out and your body accidentally thaws out. The NY Ledger calls it “Horrifying.”
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 20, 2018
Happy Saturday! Apparently there’s going to be a strike next week that we should be preparing for, but like all of you we’re procrastinating.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 20, 2018
Apparently cable news show host Faith Yancey is on campus again. Anyone willing to go undercover to figure out which Hudson scandal she’s investigating?
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 19, 2018
Due to next week’s planned strike, we are currently hiring scabs and rousters to intimidate our striking employees. #WorkAtHudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 19, 2018
That bizarre carnival that sprang up out of nowhere on the quad is not officially sanctioned by Hudson University. Anyone brave enough to ask those carnies what they’re doing?
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 19, 2018
Thanks to a generous donation from Packard Bell, we are finally replacing all of those Commodore 6.4 computers in our computer lab. Our new computers now actually access the Internet thanks to another donation from AOL!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 19, 2018
We are proud to announce that we have finally found new corporate sponsors for our Business Success Institute to replace Enron! Join us in welcoming the Sears/K-Mart Business Success Institute to campus! pic.twitter.com/hT7dVd84AI
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 19, 2018
It’s subpoena day on campus. Can you dodge the process servers on your way to class? #AvoidTheQuad
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 19, 2018
It’s finally Friday! Go Wild this weekend- but not too wild... #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 19, 2018
#DidYouKnow that the only Hudson team not suspended or under investigation by the NCAA is the badminton team? #DidYouKnow that the Hudson badminton team actually exists?
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 18, 2018
Yet again we must challenge an assertion made by The Ledger. Our endowment has not been “squandered” due to mismanagement. It’s getting depleted due to our huge legal costs. #HudsonMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 18, 2018
#DidYouKnow that we’ll name practically anything on campus after you for a donation? There are naming opportunities available for just a $25 donation! At the $25 level, a dining commons rat can be named after you. #Donate2Hudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 18, 2018
It has come to our attention that “48 Hours” feels slighted by us giving “Dateline NBC” special parking privileges. We take their concerns very seriously, but not seriously enough to actually give them any dedicated parking spaces. #HudsonUDoesNotCare
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 18, 2018
Our campus administration would like to refute the claims made by The Ledger this morning. Campus executives are not indifferent to the needs of our staff; they just care about themselves more than they care about staff. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 18, 2018
Remember when “Quincy, M.E.” featured Hudson University? They exaggerated our crime rate at the time. They were off by .4%! #ThrowbackThursday pic.twitter.com/y5lbYbPbvt
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 18, 2018
Happy Thursday! Hard to believe that we’ve only been back for almost a month already. It feels like forever. #Sigh
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 18, 2018
You may have noticed that many of Hudson’s online services are not working right now. We are currently experiencing an issue with several servers; apparently they were stolen out of our secure data center. #SorryFolks
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 17, 2018
#DidYouKnow that credits earned at the Rikers Island prison college can be applied to a Hudson degree? Make the best of your incarceration and continue your studies! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 17, 2018
The Tripley Lab “situation” has been fully handled and all of the animals have been put back in their cages except for one squirrel and he’s actually the most dangerous of all the animals kept at Tripley Lab, so if you see him, please call security and consult a mortician.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 17, 2018
Hudson management is committed to keeping campus open during the strike. We expect minimal disruption to campus operations because we’re not that good at running things even when we’re fully staffed. #HudsonStrike
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 17, 2018
It has come to our attention that several Hudson unions are planning strikes next week. Our chancellor would like you to know that there will be no retaliation against you if you choose to join the strike, but you probably shouldn’t strike “if you know what’s good for you.”
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 17, 2018
Are you taking Business Ethics 101A? Your professor was indicted for insider trading and cannot continue teaching the class, so you all get an A! #AutomaticA
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 17, 2018
Hey everyone- it’s Wednesday! Tripley Lab has experienced a catastrophic power failure. All of the animals inside the building have escaped and they are very angry and aggressive. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 17, 2018
Please be advised: all of the free student legal assistance hours for the 2018/2019 academic year have been used. Please try not to do anything requiring legal assistance for the rest of the year. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 16, 2018
The character of Hannibal Lecter was not based on a Hudson Professor. Lecter was based on a composite of numerous Hudson professors. #HudsonMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 16, 2018
#DidYouKnow that Hudson is the only university that will accept credits earned at the Sally Struthers Correspondence School? Put your master’s degree in TV/VCR Repair to good use at Hudson University! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 16, 2018
Are you on a campus tour right now? We don’t have any scheduled tours at the moment, so your “tour guide” is probably running a scam. Text us your location so that we can send security to arrest him. Any last requests? Text those too just in case security doesn’t arrive in time.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 16, 2018
ALERT: There’s a guy in a bad wig claiming to be Keith Morrison, except this guy is serving subpoenas instead of looking for witnesses to interview. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) October 16, 2018