Tonight on the Hallmark Channel- “I’ll Be Home From Hudson” It’s based on a true crime that occurred at Hudson! pic.twitter.com/JkWUYDYeKW
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) December 1, 2018
More crimes! More books! #HudsonPress pic.twitter.com/OSTmTYNP7w
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 30, 2018
Another fine true crime book from Hudson Press! #HudsonPress pic.twitter.com/G7Jam3Yo0j
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 30, 2018
Looking for gift ideas? Hudson Press has a wide selection of true crime books written by NYPD Detectives. #HudsonPress pic.twitter.com/8Pep45dxYK
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 30, 2018
#HudsonMemes They don’t like us posting these... but “they” aren’t here, are they? pic.twitter.com/PwxCR4k9Jz
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 30, 2018
So what will we be doing today? Posting memes like these! #DatelineNBC pic.twitter.com/apieoARchn
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 30, 2018
It’s Friday and our administrative team is out on “assignment”, probably at a Times Square Bar with an expense account. (Yes, we know it’s early.) You know what that means! #ItsFriday pic.twitter.com/5CFOPywNaB
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 30, 2018
The sanctions imposed on the Hudson University Band by the NCAA have been lifted, so they will again be able to perform at Hudson University Football games once the NCAA lifts the sanctions imposed on the football team. #HudsonUPride
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 30, 2018
We will be unable to pay our postdoc instructors until further notice. Oh wait, we don’t really pay them anyway. #Nevermind
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 29, 2018
Hudson researchers are finding answers to questions that will help all mankind. Questions like - Why do so many strange things happen in Florida? How does NYPD Detective Robert Goren know even the most obscure facts? Was Hudson built over an ancient burial ground? #Donate2Hudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 29, 2018
#DidYouKnow that our employees are slightly less likely to commit crimes than our students or faculty are? #HudsonUPride
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 29, 2018
Hey potential students- did you know that many famous celebrities have visited Hudson while fulfilling their community service? Come to Hudson and you might stumble upon Lindsay Lohan, Gary Busey or Billy Tripley!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 29, 2018
#DidYouKnow that there’s a Hudson satellite classroom at Riker’s Island? Don’t let a lengthy prison sentence get in the way of you earning your Hudson degree! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 29, 2018
We must again refute something printed in today’s Ledger. Hudson’s Secret Lab is not “bizarre” or “nightmarish”. Oh wait, it totally is those things. #Nevermind
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 29, 2018
We take offense at the Ledger’s editorial that referred to Hudson as a ‘living horror film.’ No horror film could possibly be as insane as Hudson University.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 29, 2018
We are not currently hosting a “Drunk History” taping. That drunken guy ranting and raving about history in the quad is an actual Hudson professor.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 28, 2018
The Ledger has gotten it wrong again. Hudson University does NOT force staff members to work off the clock for no pay. We do, however, “encourage” them to “volunteer”.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 28, 2018
Bribery is not permitted at Hudson University. “Donations” are gratefully accepted, however. #Donate2Hudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 28, 2018
#DidYouKnow that you can specially reserve our Rose Garden for engagement photos for just $100 for two hours? We’ll even refund half of the fee if any police action occurs during your photo shoot!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 28, 2018
If you ever find yourself in Hollywood on the Universal Studios Tour, keep an eye out for “Hudson Square”- it’s a near perfect replica of our quad, built to meet the heavy demand to film Hudson-related crime movies. #Hooray4Hudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 28, 2018
#DidYouKnow that Hudson University is the only higher education institution that has a sponsorship deal with Orion Bay Clothing Company? Apparently everyone else is too “ethical” to accept Orion Bay’s sponsorship money. Not us, though.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 28, 2018
Things are slow around campus today- in fact, the only things open around here today are the various investigations into wrongdoing. #WokkaWokka
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 28, 2018
Hudson University would like to apologize to the Academic Senate. “Sugar Pops” was indeed an inappropriate place to have a faculty meeting.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 27, 2018
It appears that the New York Ledger has again printed something that we believe to be untrue- Hudson’s Pension Plan is not a Ponzi Scheme. #WeThink
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 27, 2018
The eccentric gentleman handing out Orientation flyers on the Hudson quad is really NYPD Detective Robert Goren, apparently investigating something. Don’t trust him! He figures out your weakness and exploits it until you confess. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 27, 2018
Again, we must object to a New York Ledger article. The allegation that Hudson University is “dominated” by an “illicit secret society” is false. Hudson’s dominant secret society is hardly “illicit”. #HudsonMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 27, 2018
Have you ever had your credit card information stolen? Chances are, it was a Hudson University Computer Science Major who did it! Consider a degree in Computer Science- visit Gyson Hall!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 27, 2018
Help us keep your campus safe! If you see something, say something. Unless it involves Hudson University management or is scandalous. In that case, if you see something, report to Branch Hall for your new “scholarship”. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 27, 2018
When you’re out shopping for gifts, we’d like to remind you of Tripley Toys. Billy Tripley is a total sleaze, but he makes large donations, so... pic.twitter.com/KMlDd24DEN
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 27, 2018
#DidYouKnow that Hudson University is the only place in the world that recognizes units earned at the Sally Struthers Correspondence School? Finish your doctorate in TV/VCR Repair with us!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 26, 2018
#DidYouKnow that if you purchase a “Platinum Upgrade” for your Hudson enrollment, you’ll be guaranteed at least a B in every class? Visit Branch Hall for more information.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 26, 2018
Sick of pumpkin pie? Too bad, because someone ordered a ton of it and that’s all we’re serving in the dining commons this week.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 26, 2018
Reminder: Residence Hall burglary reports can be filed online. There’s a huge line for those insisting that they file in person, so save time online! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 26, 2018
Okay, who is the wiseguy who created #DatelineNBC Bingo and why are we included in the traditional “Free” space?!? pic.twitter.com/46mXGNybOQ
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 26, 2018
Are you a quick learner who is capable of multi-tasking, even when being questioned by NYPD Detectives? Apply to be a student assistant at Branch Hall! #WorkAtHudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 26, 2018
Happy Monday! Are you glad to be back on campus today? We’re not. :-(
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 26, 2018
If people are trying to sell you televisions, laptops, etc. on campus, it is probably stolen property from the burglaries that took place over the weekend. #WhereBadGuysGoToSchool
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 25, 2018
We will begin serving food in the dining commons tomorrow at breakfast. If you are hungry today, there are many bodegas across the street from campus that have food. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 25, 2018
It is not true that most serial killers of the last fifty years attended Hudson University, though a great deal of them did. #HudsonUMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 25, 2018
Were you planning to watch the continuing “Killer Kampus” marathon on CrimeTV from campus today? Please be advised that we have blocked that channel on campus. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 25, 2018
#DidYouKnow that you can make police reports online now at the Hudson University website? It will probably save time today as you discover that your dorm room was broken into over the weekend. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 25, 2018
Happy Sunday! As you make your way back to campus today, please bring your own hand soap if you live in the dorms. Someone stole all of the soap for some reason and we’re over budget. #WelcomeBack
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 25, 2018
Looking for the Hudson University/Faber College rivalry football game? We haven’t been able to play one in years due to Hudson’s many NCAA suspensions.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 24, 2018
The “Killer Kampus” episode that talks about the notorious “Hudson Hitman” is on in just 30 minutes. Want to come to Hudson University? Make sure your parents aren’t watching this one! #HudsonWarning
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 24, 2018
The Crime Channel is having a “Killer Kampus” marathon all weekend and most of the episodes are about Hudson University! #HudsonUPride
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 24, 2018
We can safely announce that rumors of a “Black Friday Riot” due to the big sale going on yesterday at the Hudson University Bookstore are unfounded. The riot on campus yesterday had nothing to do with Black Friday Sales. #HudsonUMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 24, 2018
Good News! We have not yet received any reports of burglaries in the residence halls over the holiday weekend. Yet.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 24, 2018
Happy Saturday! It sounds like all of the tuna fish that we left in the dorm study rooms for students staying on campus has been taken. We apologize for the shortage and remind you that we won’t start serving food again until Monday. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 24, 2018
Hudson based DVDs are also on sale! We even have the Ashley Judd Thriller- “Capital Offense” Just $5! pic.twitter.com/SX6ytvAGkA
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 24, 2018
Got a Hudson Alum on your list? Boom! Gift found! #HudsonUDeals pic.twitter.com/DSxGihV4pU
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 23, 2018
Want to save money on a gift for Mom? Boom! We got you covered! #HudsonUDeals pic.twitter.com/MMTcRnEDqp
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 23, 2018
More Discounts! More T-Shirts! #HudsonUDeals pic.twitter.com/axZPbnXi6m
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 23, 2018
#HudsonUDeals Half Off T-Shirts at the Hudson Bookstore. pic.twitter.com/gzvYy9UrkP
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 23, 2018
All shirts at the Hudson University Bookstore are half off! #HudsonUDeals pic.twitter.com/7TSKyjIvRR
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 23, 2018
Brave enough to go on campus today? We have tons of Black Friday deals at the Hudson Bookstore, including 35% off all Hudson Related true crime books. Thousands to choose from! #HudsonUDeals
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 23, 2018
#GoodNight #HappyThanksgiving pic.twitter.com/f7KUcqsWFk
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 23, 2018
Keep those donations coming, folks! #Donate2Hudson pic.twitter.com/yeU9PqlooC
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 22, 2018
I'll investigate further.
— Sonja Cori Missio (@SonjaMissio) November 22, 2018
Worst comes to worst, I'll have children, double my salary, send my kids there, and send you their hand-me-down uniforms.
@OfficialHudsonU @lawandorderpod @kevinpflynn @reblavoie
— Sonja Cori Missio (@SonjaMissio) November 22, 2018
Spotted on the TTC (Toronto Transit Commission... a streetcar). Stop trying to get/corrupt our Canadian young! pic.twitter.com/sz9OpQa75j
Have you seen NYPD Captain Olivia Benson on campus lately? Neither have we! #GoodNews pic.twitter.com/ZRqdXVSGRw
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 22, 2018
Do you know about the “Hudson Hatchet Man”? No? That’s great news- for us! #HudsonUPride pic.twitter.com/0N0z6uCv64
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 22, 2018
#DidYouKnow that crime is down slightly on campus? #ReportThat pic.twitter.com/tJ7QSrM5i3
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 22, 2018
#DidYouKnow that #DatelineNBC hasn’t ever uncovered our deepest, darkest secret? We dare Keith Morrison, Josh Mankiewicz, Andrea Canning or Dennis Murphy to try to figure out what we’ve been hiding! #HudsonUPride pic.twitter.com/0ZKupByEvu
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 22, 2018
Happy Thanksgiving! Today we give thanks for all the wonderful things that have (or haven’t) happened on campus lately! #HappyThanksgiving pic.twitter.com/WpadeU7SDg
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 22, 2018
Well kids, have a Happy Thanksgiving! Remember- getting arrested for fighting on Black Friday won’t affect your academic standing at Hudson, so go ahead and fight for that discounted TV! We hear BargainTown has the best deal this year! #TheyPaidUsToSayThat
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 22, 2018
Hudson Students: Are you meeting up for mini reunions with your high school friends this evening when you’re back home? Sure, you’ll promise to keep in touch, but the only time you’ll ever see these people again is on the evenings before Thanksgiving. #HudsonTruth
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 21, 2018
Due to “unbecoming behavior”, the Hudson University Marching Band was barred from ever performing in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade by R.H. Macy himself! It was the only permanent ban ever handed down by Mr. Macy and nobody remembers why he did it. #HudsonHistory
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 21, 2018
It’s already getting quiet around here! Anyone going to brave the cold miserable weather tomorrow morning just so you can say you went to the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in person instead of watching it on TV like someone who is sane? #ItWillBeCold
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 21, 2018
Are you staying in the dorms over the long weekend? Remember- you’re on your own! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 21, 2018
Is anyone missing a kidney? #Asking4AFriend
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 21, 2018
Happy Wednesday! We’re almost there! (If you’ve already skipped town to go home, you’re already there, we guess.)
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 21, 2018
Are you still looking for a Thanksgiving Turkey? Come to Tripley Lab and pick up one of our fresh, free turkeys! You just have to agree to keep a journal listing all of the weird things that happen to the family members who eat it and sign a special waiver! #FreeHudsonTurkeys
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 21, 2018
Please notify security immediately if you run into a smelly wino dressed as Santa Claus. That’s Vice-Chancellor Hom and we need to get him to the Hudson Day Care Center so he can surprise the kids. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 20, 2018
If NYPD Detective Robert Goren approaches you to say that he wants to help you make your dorm room safer, don’t believe him. He probably suspects that you’re the Hudson Slasher and is trying to con you into confessing. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 20, 2018
Due to the large number of dorm room break-ins that occurred last year during Thanksgiving Weekend, we are advising students to make sure they have adequate insurance that covers dorm thefts. Did you think we were going to say that we were increasing security? #NotAChance
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 20, 2018
Due to continued negative feedback on our plan to leave one Banquet Turkey dinner for each student who is staying on campus over Thanksgiving, we are leaving *two* Banquet Turkey Dinners for each student. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 20, 2018
Some of you May have received an e-mail from Professor Jess Mackenzie stating that she needed help with bail after getting arrested in Tijuana for indecent exposure. Sadly, this message is not a scam. #BailHerOut
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 20, 2018
Happy Tuesday! Is it Thursday yet?!?!?
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 20, 2018
We are not lighting the campus Christmas tree; as a matter of fact, we don’t have a campus Christmas tree. The people running around the tree have just committed arson. #Call911
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 20, 2018
Hey students! Most of your professors are going to duck out early this week, so you can probably just go home now instead of waiting for them to cancel class at the last minute. You’ll probably be safer that way. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 19, 2018
A Hudson fact to tell around the dining room table on Thanksgiving- Crime on campus is actually down .035%, mainly due to campus being closed last week! #HudsonFacts
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 19, 2018
We received negative feedback about our plan to leave just tuna fish cans for students staying in the dorms over the holiday. Now in addition to the tuna fish cans, unlucky students stuck in the dorms will also receive turkey dinners. Banquet Turkey Dinners. #HudsonUCares pic.twitter.com/67A4cczmdL
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 19, 2018
The Hudson Bookstore will be hosting its own “Early Black Friday” sale tomorrow. 50% off all true crime books based on crimes committed at Hudson University! Thousands of titles to choose from!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 19, 2018
Please be advised: The dorms will only serve turkey loaf this week on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. Looking for something else? Profaci’s Pizza still delivers to Hudson. We think.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 19, 2018
Happy Monday! Since most of our management team is already enjoying their holidays, we can tweet anything we like. We probably won’t, though. #WeNeedTheWork
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 19, 2018
The wild turkeys that make the Rose Garden their home are descendants of some turkeys who escaped from Tripley Labs years ago, so you probably should not try to capture and eat them. #NotAGoodIdea
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 19, 2018
If you’re making your way home this week, have a safe trip and please tell your family members that despite what they might have seen on Dateline NBC or Investigation Discovery, our campus is (mostly) safe! #HudsonUPride
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 18, 2018
90 years ago, Mickey Mouse made his grand debut! We’re often called a “Mickey Mouse operation”, so we’re happy to wish him a happy birthday.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 18, 2018
#DidYouKnow that we turn off the heat during Thanksgiving Day Weekend even if you are staying in the dorms? Need heat? There are many portable space heaters for sale in the bookstore! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 18, 2018
We’d like to remind everyone that classes are still in session on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday of next week. Of course, there’s no way of knowing who goes to class and who leaves early for the holiday, but we trust our students. #NotReally
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 18, 2018
If you let us know that you will be staying in the dorms over Thanksgiving Weekend, we’ve made arrangements and will leave a supply of tuna fish in the student lounge for you. If you didn’t register, you can try to steal your neighbors’ supply of tuna fish.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 18, 2018
It’s Sunday! Are you planning to eat brunch at Briscoe’s Cafe? Make new plans- it got shut down by the health inspector again! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 18, 2018
This is our 4,000th Tweet! It seems like it was just yesterday when a clueless Associate Dean asked us why we weren’t “on the tweeter” and thought we could change the perception of Hudson as a place where the bad guys go to school. We met one of those goals- we’re on the Tweeter! pic.twitter.com/dQbfbCvWVF
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 17, 2018
That guy who keeps telling everyone he’s Keith Morrison has earned the loyalty of the wild dog pack that roams campus. So try to stay on his good side, even though we’re about 98% certain he is NOT actually Mr. Morrison. pic.twitter.com/3jZzeLi07T
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 17, 2018
You never know who you’ll bump into on our campus! That’s why we have an assortment of Hudson University branded tasers in a variety of colors available in the Student Store! When Lindsay Lohan or Randy Quaid won’t take no for an answer, go ahead and tase ‘em!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 17, 2018
We are proud to announce that Hudson University is getting its very own on-campus morgue! You will no longer have to take a subway or taxi to 1PP to identify a body! #OnlyAtHudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 17, 2018
Are you the person who keeps defacing Professor Kelner’s office door by scrawling “Professor Killer” on it? Please stop; it’s very immature and Professor Kelner was acquitted of all those charges. #HudsonUMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 17, 2018
If you ever find yourself in Hollywood on the Universal Studios Tour, keep an eye out for “Hudson Square”- it’s a near perfect replica of our quad, built to meet the heavy demand to film Hudson-related crime movies. #Hooray4Hudson
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 17, 2018
Happy Saturday! Please note that it might take us awhile to get things back to what counts as normal around here. Please bear with us! #PleaseDoNotSueUs
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 17, 2018
Have a great weekend before Thanksgiving Week, Students! And please don’t do anything that will get you on a future episode of Dateline NBC! #WeMeanIt
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 17, 2018
#DidYouKnow that Hudson Press publishes the largest collection of true crime books of any major or minor publisher? We’re sure that’s just a coincidence, though. #HudsonUPride
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 16, 2018
#DidYouKnow that the primary mission of Hudson University is to educate its students and not provide them with a haven for their criminality? #HudsonUMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 16, 2018
Hudson Administration would like to thank you for your patience as we worked through the issues caused by the mysterious semi-toxic cloud that appeared over campus this past week. The issues we faced were mainly due to our disorganized response and were not malicious. #DoNotSue
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 16, 2018
You may have heard the legend of a so-called “Hudson Thanksgiving Massacre” that took place in 1910 when a Hudson student stuck on campus committed several axe murders. Since only three people were killed by the crazed killer, it was hardly a massacre. #HudsonMythBusting
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 16, 2018
For those of you who will be going home to your families for the holiday, please tell everyone how wonderful Hudson is and how much you love it here. If you know what’s good for you, that is...
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 16, 2018
It’s been a wild and crazy week! If you will be staying on campus for the holiday next week, today is your last day to let us know! We’ll be leaving cans of tuna fish in the dorms and will need to know how many we should get, so please let us know! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 16, 2018
We have received the all clear! As a token of our appreciation, we would like to offer all faculty, staff and students free pizza for the inconvenience! Just sign a little waiver first and then grab yourselves some pizza! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 16, 2018
Our campus leadership is carefully evaluating the current Hazmat situation from their important business meeting in Hawaii. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 15, 2018
We are now asking that all “essential” employees come in for work. Keep in mind, however, that you are not considered to be “essential” when we’re negotiating pay raises. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 15, 2018
You may have seen the news reports featuring people trudging around campus in Hazmat suits. The suits are just a precaution and there is no reason to believe that anyone exposed to the semi-toxic fumes yesterday are in any danger. We think.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 15, 2018
Looking for a place to hang out while campus is closed? Why not try the Central Public Library? Strange people are always hanging out around there. As a Hudson student you’ll fit right in!
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 15, 2018
The stories about the semi-toxic cloud giving our campus squirrels special powers are false. Campus squirrels have always been extremely aggressive and glowed in the dark. #HudsonUPride
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 15, 2018
Students who are being evacuated from the dorms are free to find alternate accommodations until further notice. We hear that the bus terminal has some pretty comfy benches! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 15, 2018
ALERT: Due to yesterday’s unfortunate unrequested semi-toxic gas cloud, we are being forced to close campus to everyone today. All classes are canceled and we are asking non-essential staffmembers to stay away from campus. Students living in the dorms must evacuate immediately.
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 15, 2018
Before you go- were you one of the “lucky” staff members who won the slap fight for a face mask? Please return your face mask for future use. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
Okay, since there’s just 30 minutes left and the semi-toxic cloud has somewhat dissipated, staff can now go home. Thank you for your understanding! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
Did you miss out on getting a free face mask? The Hudson Bookstore has them on sale for just $24.95! Pick one up now! #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
We are handing out face masks to those who are looking to avoid breathing in the semi-toxic fumes. We only have twelve and they’re all in Branch Hall, so first come, first served! #HudsonCloudPocalypse
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
There’s always a silver lining, even in a toxic gas cloud; NYPD Detective Goren has not been seen anywhere on campus today, so nobody has been tricked into confessing to a crime. #HudsonCloudPocalypse
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
Despite recent allegations, Hudson University is no longer associated with Dr. Harrison Wells and his controversial Star Labs as of this morning. The mysterious semi-toxic cloud that is hovering over campus is not related to this recent development. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
Our chancellor would like all of you to know that he is closely monitoring the semi-toxic gas situation and taking the issue seriously. Just because he’s currently at a plush resort in Hawaii doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care. #HudsonCloudPocalypse
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
Were you planning on going out to lunch? If you’re a staff member stuck on campus under the semi-toxic cloud, that’s not a good idea. The vending machines on campus don’t get fully restocked until tomorrow, so there might be slim pickings. #HudsonCloudPocalypse
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
Particles from the toxic gas cloud are causing issues with our servers, therefore we are moving vital servers off campus to a secure location. Staff, however, are still required to keep working. #HudsonCloudPocalypse
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
Due to the semi-toxic gas cloud, we are moving the animals in Tripley Lab to a safer place off-campus. Staff, however, are still required to stay on campus. #HudsonCloudPocalypse
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
Hudson Administration has received some valuable feedback about their decision to require staff to come in with the gas cloud still lingering over campus. The gas cloud is only “semi-toxic”. Plus, all full time staff have health insurance. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018
ALERT: Due to a semi-toxic gas cloud (totally unrelated to our crazy experiments in Tripley Hall) lingering over campus, we are canceling classes today. Campus will remain open, however, so all employees are expected to come in for work. #HudsonUCares
— Hudson University (@OfficialHudsonU) November 14, 2018